Bright Ribbons, Low Lights

For Aunt Jeanne...the good fight is never over.

They say the devil may care when all hope is gone,
but that would leve me nothing for today.
So I'm on bended knee with eyes closed to the world,
and I'm remembering how to pray.

We walk, we write letters, we hold up big signs
for all the mothers & sisters we love so much.
Sometimes there's no words, though, to cover the distance
to those hearts we need to touch.

They have fallen, they have passed, they have gone to their maker...
They've met an early grave.
But they have shown us true love, what it means to be a hero...
There are so many left we can save.

So we'll stand here together, from this day to the last,
praying for those so pure,
and we'll never stop caring and sharing the memories.
One day, we will find a cure.

Folded

Long and hard was the road we shared
that out of darkness led up to light.
Little did I know just how much you cared
because not once did I ever see you take up the fight.

Dark & frightening was the road I walked alone
each & every time you left for selfish reasons.
Sweating like a pig or chilled to the bone,
you changed your faces just like the seasons.

Satisfied in pain now is the only road I walk
and no more worries of your words fill my mind.
Not one more step or movement will you stalk
when I make my road impossible to find.

Blindsight is 20/20

It's everything and nothing you always avoided and wanted to be.
It's ingrown flowers blooming deadly, hiding your eyes so you can see.
It's breaking ground and stopping production on all these beautiful terrors.
It's clouding out and shining light on a perfect God's great error.

It's the time it took to leave and stay for all eternity.
It's time to show the bastard your rights to paternity.
It's laser-guided capability that can't find a fucking thing.
It's a slashed throat bleeding everywhere, and stopping just to sing.

It's the breathtaking artwork of archane machinery making you vomit on the beach.
It's the softest touch ripping off your hand; it's yourself that's out of reach.
It's the way they fell when they stood tall, selling you out for their ideals.
It's the way you're numb all day long, and no one else knows how it feels.

Aggressive Perfector*

*from Slayer's 'Haunting the Chapel', 1984


She came along and took it from my hands, the blanket I'd woven for myself.
It engulfed her like blood, like a comfort so few would understand.
She filled it out much better than I ever could have, the bumps and curves in all the right places.

There was something fundamentally wrong with the picture, though.
This was me and what I am. This was building quite a dam.
This was every overtaking I'd resisted for years.

She came along and wrapped herself in it, the crimson cover I had sought.
It kissed every line and ran like wildfire over every single turn.
The body was definately still warm.

There was something indecent about the thoughts I couldn't contain.
This was my last straw of pride. There was no one left on my side.
This was the loss of a fate I couldn't quite make.

She took it off, only to rise again, freed from sanguine captivity.
It fell like the curtain from some show only I could see.
She made it her own in a way that was still foreign to me.

There was something wonderful about the abandonment I felt.
This was me, once again alone, and this was me, chilled to the bone.
This was the fear I needed, and now I'm beautifully unwhole.

You May Now Respond

Through the blood red sky you can stare with a potent mix of anger and shame,
and you can wonder what kind of man I've become, and try to shift the blame,
but I'm telling you one last time I don't need you, you never helped me become whole,
and I could give two shits about the fake impact you think you've had on my soul.

In the pale morning light you can squint and seek out the motives driving my hate,
and you can ponder your words to me, guessing what was to be the crap laid upon my slate,
but I swear to God and all below that your advice has been taken worth a grain of salt,
and no matter what else comes out of my mouth, you better know it's not your fault.

With decline in mind, through the blistering heat of all of our last days,
you can count the prayers that you held for me, and question them in so many ways,
but it's fact tried and true that I'll never need you to intervene for my sake,
and I better not see any crocodile tears when they close the casket at my wake.

These Lies, Our Chosen Roles*

*from "Of One Blood" by Shadows Fall

Decadence and degradation, after all it's worth at least a paid vacation.
It's time to go under the cloak and dagger, for one last night, I'll turn and swagger.

I've got too many chips to cash out now, and I'm not yet done being under the plow.
So you pour this shit in front of me, right there where all my eyes can see, but I'll have the control you'll never be.
It wasn't denied for lack of brain, no matter how ill-gotten the gain, it was what kept me from going insane.

But I'm stronger than all now, the blindfold is gone.
I'm seeing more than all now, between the right and wrong.
I'm making amends now to all I've hurt,
but I can't take the blood off my own shirt.

It's time you saw what they made me do.
This was the crux of my new attitude.
But the truth is something worse I can't stop.
I can't deny wanting every last drop.

So what do I face and how do I replace all the locations I am going?
How many times must I repeat the crimes to all the new people I'm knowing?
And how the hell do I fight the smell of the bottles so beautifully glowing?

I've got no answers, no time left, not another moment to act bereft.
I've got just enough energy here to contemplate this theft.

Mapping Pantallica

These times are said to try men's souls.
No tears can cleanse these regrets.
I'm bone, brain, and cock.

Would you look at me now, and can you tell I'm a man?
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Language of the mad...

Mutiny in the air...
You can't be something you're not.
All alone, and the memories still remain.

This world is shattered.
No damn chains can hold me to the ground.
Where's the dreams that I've been after?

When I die, I'll cast a shadow.
What's done is done and gone, so why try?
This shortest straw has been pulled for you.